Saturday Morning Message: Events that have the Power to Heal

Author: Carol Lane

Good morning,

TAPS has many events throughout the year. This picture shows survivors at a Brooklyn Nets practice. Visit the TAPS events calendar to see which upcoming TAPS Events are interesting to you. No matter which ones you choose to attend, the support you will find is comforting, as you will read in the responses survivors share this week.

 TAPS Families attend Brooklyn Nets game

Remember, you can write to me anytime — to contribute, subscribe or if you have thoughts on what could make the Saturday Morning Message more helpful. I look forward to hearing from you. In addition to this weekly message, I also put together a monthly Writers’ Circle in which survivors send essays, poems and other written pieces that come from their hearts. You don’t have to contribute each month, but you may want to read what others say about their grief journey. To register for either the Saturday Morning Message or the Writers’ Circle, send me an email at

Carol Lane
Mother of Bryon


Answers from Survivors

Responses from Survivors to last week's question: What have you found healing at a TAPS event you have attended? 

From Shelton, father of Adam: The love and support of my peers. Hugs that seem to last forever. Knowing I'm on a journey with families who show me nothing but compassion. Last but not least, the smiles on my daughters’ faces.

From Betty, mother of Brian: It is a safe place where I take off my “mask.” I can find consolation from others and I can give consolation also. It is so wonderful to be able to spend time with people who understand what I am going through on my new life journey. It is just a nice escape from the outside world.

From Patricia, mother of Daniel: I think being able to share honest emotions within my TAPS family is incredibly healing. I don't have to deny tears or feel guilty about moments of joy. We are welcomed, loved, and cared for with total understanding.

From Robyn, mother of Cole: Being with a population where those who 'get it' are the majority and you are not avoided. A group who honor my son by asking about him instead of trying to pretend he never was. I have only been to one (TAPS event) so far, but I am looking forward to Sedona (women’s retreat) in April. TAPS has been an incredible support the past year.

From Carolyn, mother of Travis: Spending time with peers and listening to talks by the wonderful speakers.

If you would like to send a message thanking one or all of those who participated in this week’s Saturday Morning Message, send it to me at and I will make sure your thoughts are passed along to them.


Question for Next Week’s Saturday Morning Message 

Some of us leave gifts at our loved one's gravesite that we think they'll appreciate — a bottle of their favorite whiskey or beer, perhaps a flower they liked or a toy that reminds you of a joke only the two of you would understand. What have you left at the cemetery as a token of your relationship? We look forward to your responses and perhaps pictures you would like to share.


We can honor our loved ones by communicating with each other through writing. You never know how your words may touch the heart of another. I encourage you to reply to the Saturday Morning Message by emailing I directly receive all responses that are sent to this address. In order to have your reply included in the week’s Saturday Morning Message, it is best to send it to me by Tuesday morning of the following week. Thank you to everyone responding this week and those who read this message.


♫ Song for the Week

Laura, mother of Aaron sent the song this week that she heard at a recent funeral she attended. She found it beautiful and very touching. It is "Jealous of the Angels". I chose this version sung by Donna Taggert. 

It came to my attention that some of you may not be sending songs that have already been featured in the Saturday Morning Message. Everyone finds different meaning in a song, so please send me your favorite songs for this song of the week section at and include a note about why the song is meaningful to you.


Related Stories

attendees at national seminar

Saturday Morning Message: Reactions to TAPS Seminar or Retreat

Attending a TAPS event can bring up different emotions depending where we are on our grief journey. TAPS Survivors share their feelings at the time and what the experience meant to them.

Nashville Songwriters

Nashville Songwriters Rock the House for TAPS Families

The Colorado Springs Songwriters Classic once again continue supporting families of the fallen and honor our loved ones.

Other Items and Events of Interest

Arlington Cemetery family at headstone

Join us on Memorial Day Weekend, May 28 to 30, for our 27th Annual National Military Survivor Seminar! We will be live streaming all of our general sessions with guest speakers.

Important Note: In-person registration is still open, but we are in a waitlist situation due to COVID occupancy restrictions in the State of Virginia. 

If you have any questions, email or call our Helpline at 202.588.TAPS (8277).

Learn More and Register


▶▶  Connect With Your TAPS Family 

You can discover all the opportunities to connect with your TAPS Family on our website at the TAPS Event Calendar.

About the Saturday Morning Message

The Saturday Morning Message (SMM) is a weekly communication contributed by survivors. The primary focus of the SMM is to foster peer-based connections for support and encouragement. It is the goal of this communication to foster a safe, supportive place where we can openly share in a nonjudgmental and caring manner. Read and contribute as you are comfortable. Content submitted for the SMM is edited for space considerations and may be used in other TAPS publications. The loving family at TAPS is available to you 24 hours a day. Please call 202-588-TAPS (8277).