Saturday Morning Message: Sharing Special Memories

Author: Carol Lane

Good Morning,

In this week's message, the responders share delightful memories of their loved ones. These thoughts put a smile on my face as I read them and I hope you will also enjoy them.

Peer Mentor sharing memory of her loved one

Sharing memories of our loved ones with others who understand brings joy to our hearts and makes TAPS such a special group. Prior to the pandemic, many of us went to seminars in person which is where these two survivors found each other. I chose this picture for the opening, because you can see they are talking and one of them is holding their memorial dog tags with a picture of her loved one attached, so I imagine they are sharing information. Talking about our loved ones is a wonderful way to introduce others to these special people.

Carol Lane
Mother of Bryon

Responses from Survivors to last week's question

What is a special memory of your loved one you would like to share, so we can get to know that person better? 

From Elizabeth, spouse of Joseph: The first thing that came to mind when I read the question for the week was something that happened when we first started dating.  We were riding along when I noticed a big patch of dandelions. I have no idea why I liked them so much. When I mentioned that, Joe pulled a u-turn on a busy street to stop and pick some for me. Years later when we had a lawn, he never tried to kill them off.

From Christine, spouse of Dennis: My husband loved lima beans. Just as we were about to get married, he told me that all he wanted was lima beans at our dinner. He said you can have anything you want, flowers, cake, invitations, everything, but I want some lima beans. And so, on the day of our wedding, he got some lima beans.

From Essie, mother of Tysheena: Tysheena was a comical young lady. She always would peek in our bedroom door and smile. Then she would come and jump between the both of us and just lay there until her dad would get up. She used to fiddle with his ears or his head. Then he would turn around and tickle her. So special! I often think of all the crazy things we've done, and smile.

If you would like to send a message thanking one or all of those who participated in this week’s Saturday Morning Message, send it to and your thoughts will be passed along to them. You never know how your words may touch the heart of another.

Question for Next Week’s Saturday Morning Message 

What is something you did with your loved one that you continue to do?

Elizabeth, spouse of Joseph gave the idea for the next question when she wrote, “Do others continue old habits?  I still fold towels the only way Joe liked. I'd never had a preference on folding anything until I met him.”

We all pick up things we didn’t know or do before we met each other, so the next question is: What is something you did with your loved one that you continue to do? We look forward to your responses.

The Saturday Morning Message was created so survivors can share questions and read how others respond. Questions for future messages are always welcome. You can reply to this message or email In order to have your reply included the following week, it is best to send your response by Tuesday morning. Thank you to everyone responding this week and those who read this message.

♫ Song for the Week

This week’s song, "The Way We Were" by Barbara Streisand fit right in with the topic of memories.

You can send me favorite songs for this song of the week section at and include a note about why the song is meaningful to you.

Related Stories


Give Yourself the Gift of Memory

Focusing exclusively on the past and ignoring the present is not healthy. But as you know, memories are all you have.

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Video: Passed and Present

This webinar video recording unveils new and innovative ways to help individuals remember and celebrate the family and friends they never want to forget.


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Visit the TAPS Online Community Calendar for this week's schedule of text and video chats and other offerings. We have a virtual gathering most days of the week. Whether you want to share your story or just read how other survivors are sharing and coping, this online grief support community is a way for you to develop and strengthen your connections with TAPS.

Other Items and Events of Interest

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Join Us for the Next Virtual Seminar

Please join us for our September Virtual Military Survivor Seminar, September 18 and 19. This two-day event will begin on Friday evening with Sharing Groups and conclude with a session on meditative movement. Activities begin at 2 p.m. Eastern on Saturday and will be presented at no cost to you. Our sessions will be led by experts in the field of grief and loss, offering opportunities for you to gain tools and resources. 


The TAPS National Military Suicide Survivor Seminar is going virtual. Held October 16-18, you will hear from others who have walked the road you are traveling. Sessions will offer vital information on anxiety, loss and family dynamics, talking to children and more. The grief that follows suicide loss can be uniquely complicated. You are not alone, and we invite you to join us for a time of hope and healing. 

Peer Mentor Training 

Looking for a chance to give back? You've been through the early days of grief and remember how connecting to TAPS was helpful to you. You remember when another reached out a hand to you to share the journey. Now you may be ready to help someone else. TAPS Peer Mentors are survivors who are 18 months beyond their loss and feel ready to be a companion to another. You may even find that opening your heart to another will offer you continued healing as well. Become a TAPS Peer Mentor.

You can discover all the opportunities to connect with your TAPS family on our website at the TAPS Event Calendar.

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Did you lose your loved on due to an illness loss

If your military loved one suffered with a wound, illness, or injury, please consider taking our new Illness Loss Survivor Survey, so TAPS can honor your loved one through our advocacy efforts.

If you took the survey last year, we ask that you retake it as we've made important updates. Your response could help shape policy and legislation, and direct future TAPS programs and services. To learn more, email

Those who take the survey will receive a discount to the TAPS store for providing this important and valuable feedback. 

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AmazonSmile is a simple way for you to support TAPS every time you shop, at no cost to you. Visit, log in, and select TAPS as your charity of choice. Amazon will give 0.5% of your eligible purchases to TAPS.

About the Saturday Morning Message

The Saturday Morning Message (SMM) is a weekly communication; written and contributed to by survivors. The primary focus of the Saturday Morning Message is to foster peer-based connection for support and encouragement.  It is the goal of this communication to foster a safe, supportive atmosphere where we can openly share in a non-judgmental and caring manner. Read and contribute as you are comfortable, and explore any opinions/ideas shared that are most beneficial to you on your individual journey. Content submitted for inclusion in the Saturday Morning Message is edited for spacing considerations, grammatical corrections and may be used in other TAPS publications.  

To subscribe or contribute to the Saturday Morning Message email

If you ever need to speak to someone regarding an urgent matter or just need a listening ear, the loving family at TAPS is available to you 24 hours a day. Please feel free to contact TAPS at 800-959-8277.