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The death of a loved one who served in the military can turn your normal life upside down. Sometimes even your friends can’t understand what you are going through after the death of your loved one, because they haven’t been where you are. You may feel isolated, lonely or just plain sad. Grief is a normal response to loving someone and losing them, but it can hurt so much. And it may not just be you who is hurting. Other people in your life that you love may also be in pain, and you are not quite sure what to do or how to help them. Wherever you are at - you are not alone.

TAPS welcomes anyone who is grieving the death of someone who died while serving in the military - regardless of where they died or how they died. If you are hurting, we are here for you. We are so sorry for the loss of your loved one.

We know that military loss can feel very different, from other types of loss in your life. There is a public meaning often assigned to the death. You may have questions about the death, feelings you aren't sure how to process.

We began as a group of bereaved military families who lost their loved ones in a military plane crash in Alaska in 1992. Those families found comfort, connection and hope in talking with each other as they rebuilt their lives. After undertaking a two year study of support services available for bereaved military families, Bonnie Carroll founded TAPS in 1994 and modeled it on best practices found in peer-based support programs. We provide a safe and confidential program that supports people who are grieving.

You can connect with TAPS in one way or many ways:

  • Call us - if you would like to talk with someone on our survivor care team who can let you know about services and programs you might find helpful, or just need someone to talk to, please call us any time at 1.800.959.TAPS (8277). Our resource and information helpline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
  • Sign up for a survivor resource kit and join our mailing list - we have a kit filled with resources and materials to help in coping with the death of your loved one. Sign up here. We can also add you to our mailing list so you'll start to receive the TAPS magazine each quarter.
  • Read articles about grief and loss in the TAPS magazine. Or visit our survivor care area online.
  • Get support through our online communities or real-time chats.
  • Request a peer mentor - this program connects you one-on-one with a caring person who has experienced a similar loss and has been trained in how to companion someone else who is grieving.
  • Connect with other survivors at a TAPS care group in your local community or request a customized list of grief support resources in your community.
  • Find out about bereavement counseling at a Vet Center or through another provider - our staff can help you set up the appointment if you like.
  • Meet other survivors at a TAPS event- see our event calendar.
  • Get questions answered - contact our casualty casework staff if you need help accessing benefits, want assistance requesting information, or don't know where to turn for answers in a difficult situation related to your loved one's death.

We are so sorry to get to know you, because we know you came here because you lost someone who died. But we are so glad you found us, and we are here for you. 

2013 National Banner Image  
TAPS Event | You are warmly invited to attend the 19th Annual TAPS National Military Survivor Seminar and Good Grief Camp for Young Survivors. Join us as we bring together survivors to share a weekend of understanding, hope, courage, and love.  
Our Stories
Topic: General Grief
Rachael
Expectations

TAPS Blog | Do you ever wonder why there are always so many expectations put on us as we are working our way down this grief path?  Dealing with the death of a loved one is hard enough in itself, but it proves even harder when the people around you add more pressure as to what they think you should, and should .. More »

Rozier Surviving Sibgs
My Little Buddies

TAPS Blog | The four of us siblings span 9 years, Jon being the oldest and Joshua the youngest; Benjamin and I sharing the dreaded middle child seat. For years none of us would discuss Jonathan's death amongst each other. The first time we shared a substantive conversation about it was with other bereaved sibli.. More »

Bunny and son
Introducing Bunnie Jacquay

TAPS Blog | It has been five years since Bunnie Jacquay's son, Cody, died in Iraq.  Since that time has passed, Bunnie has learned to lean on friends as she carries on the legacy of his life while making new paths of her own... More »

Saturday Morning
New Discoveries from Grief

TAPS Blog | In today's Saturday morning message, survivors weigh in on how the death of their loved one has changed them, to include the good and the bad discoveries they have learned about themselves.    .. More »

Worry
You’re Not Going Crazy…

TAPS Magazine | Oceans of ink have been spilled on the subjects of love and loss, and it makes sense that the two are so closely linked. The pain of loss is in direct correlation with the love we feel. The more we love, the more keenly we feel the absence of that which we love. .. More »

Faded Barn
Moments…Just Moments

TAPS Magazine | Have you ever had a moment? You know, a moment when time stood still and everything was as it should be—right and good and whole and wonderful. A moment when you were in the right place at the right time and life was good. Did you ever have a moment like that? .. More »

Stairs
Proactive Grieving

TAPS Magazine | When my father died in 1969, I was only 15 years old. My mom told me that I was the man of the family now and that I needed to take care of the farm and my sisters. I did just that. I did not grieve, I did not cry, I did not publicly mourn. I hid my sorrow as if it were some awful secret I was asham.. More »

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