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Resolutions (Or Not?)

    

Date: January 28 , 2013

Home Page Tabs Title: Resolutions (Or Not?)

Posted By: TAPS

I resolve to do nothing. Yep, that’s right. I know it’s January, and I know I should be setting some kind of New Year’s Resolution, but this year my resolution is to do absolutely nothing.

Text:

2013
Resolutions (Or Not?)

~ Michelle Marcum, Survivor

January 28, 2013

I resolve to do nothing.

Yep, that’s right. I know it’s January, and I know I should be setting some kind of New Year’s Resolution, but this year my resolution is to do absolutely nothing.

I’m not going to worry about my weight, or my hair, or my house. I’m not going to stress about the clock that’s two minutes too slow or the train that’s blocked my path. I’m not going to give a moment’s thought to the wrinkly clothes that didn’t get folded in time after their last tumble. None of it really matters. This year, I’m taking care of me.

I’m going to search for the pockets of joy tucked within each day. I’m going to give hugs whenever the mood strikes me. I’m going to take a walk, all alone. I’m going to lie in the grass on the first day of spring until I find a four-leaf clover. I might be there forever. I’m going to count the stars in the sky each night, and I’m going to hold hands every chance I get. I’m going to love like there’s no tomorrow. Because maybe there isn’t.

I’m going to open the windows even when it’s cool and light my candles in the brightness of day. Maybe I’ll give all my gifts in nifty bags this year and skip the time-consuming paper process. Then again, maybe I’ll painstakingly wrap each surprise with mitered corners and beautiful ribbon. Maybe I’ll just give the gift of my time and forego the packaging altogether. Perhaps I’ll make new traditions.

Maybe I’ll pay some old friends a visit. Or make a new friend. I might throw a party for no reason at all. I’ll fly a kite when the wind whispers, “it’s time.” I’ll rent a canoe and paddle the perimeter of the lake. I’ll climb the highest fire tower and ignore the quivering muscles protesting the ascent. I’ll sit on a park bench and watch the sun slip away.

This year, I resolve to do nothing at all but just… be.

I don’t know about you, but somewhere in the hustle of getting back to my old self—or new self—I’ve missed the point. I’ve been in a hurry to get where I’m going, but I am not sure where the destination lies. I’ve filled every day until it’s overflowing. Erupting. Spewing nothing but stress and chaos. In my effort to fill the gaps and stop the sadness from seeping in, I’ve created a life I’d rather escape. Busyness doesn’t bring about happiness. And happiness is not the opposite of sadness. It is quite possible to be happy and sad all at once. I’m just not sure that I can find happiness in my insulated world of “stuff.”

Thus, my commitment to starting anew. Goodbye to the meaningless. Hello to what really matters. This year, I resolve to do nothing.

But just breathe.

 


Well said! I think that we widows take our widowhood into extremes at times. It is those times when we forget to breath. Take a deep breath and just be is so much more important than looking for the next part of our lives. Our lives will come and be known to us, but if we forget to breath and just be, then that life will pass us by. By just breathing you are giving yourself the permission to wait and see what will happen instead of making it happen. There is a need to make things happen in our lives, but don't forget to breath, just breath. It will help you out in the long run.
Posted by: Cait( Visit ) at 1/28/2013 2:01 PM


i know the crazy life of which you speak,i think you have the right idea,maybe i'll give that a try,i feel trapped in my own world too,and i feel guilty for just not doing anything with my days,waiting until the last moment to do things i know have to be done,putting pressure on myself to be NORMAL again what ever that is,and it's not gonna happen,i am a different person now,i'm not wild about me and i have to hang out with me everyday,sucks,not the life i have chosen,but the one i have to get through,i want to be happy again,smile for no reason,stop bursting into tears at the drop of a hat,how do i get there from here? i don't know,but i know it has to be better and i'm the only one who can do that for me,good luck i hope you find peace,i hope i find peace,take care,thanks for sharing it makes a difference
Posted by: melloney ward at 1/28/2013 10:09 PM


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